New stuff

A LOT has gone on as of late. A lot of bad, and there is always good even if you are like me and have to look for it.

I've not really been in a blogging mood since learning the news of my Grandmother being sick. But it is time to move onto other things. Her death has not let me express my thoughts and feelings surrounding it just yet, so I've not even attempted to do so. I'm better at putting those into the form of poetry, and that might be all that happens, eventually, when my head and heart are not in so many conflicting places at once.


On to positive news, we have just learned last week that our family is growing.. much more than we had anticipated it would. Not by just one, but by TWO babies!! That's right, I am carrying twins. I guess our no family history and my 4% chance of it happening was great enough this time. =) I am very excited, and just hope everything will go as well as it can the rest of this pregnancy (which could only last another 4 months), and with the babies themselves. I am open to my life changing in huge, giant ways because well, it's certainly going to. I'm going to have to let things slide, bend a lot more in so many areas, ask for help? EEEK. I just don't know what to expect, there is much that awaits us from here on out. First and foremost I want to enjoy everything about this pregnancy because it is most definitely unique and special, nothing about it can compare to carrying just one baby. It's going to be amazing, and already has been incredibly challenging!! I am a veteran Mom and this time has sent me through the ringer and back early on.
Oh, but worth it, it will be.

We are also on a mission to find a new home ASAP! As some of you know, we own a VERY small home that we outgrew, well very quickly after moving here. We moved here with 2 kids and one on the way. We had planned on staying 2 years and then selling and moving to something larger. As most of us know, on the average, things don't go as planned.. as least for us they don't. The economy went down the crapper, as did Chris' income because he is in the automotive industry that took a huge hit, our lives fell behind fast and now we are buried in what we owe on our too-small-for-us house. We are looking into any available rental that could possibly suit as as far as location, size, and price. Fortunately for us, there is a lot out there, more so in further out areas as we are now.. but a lot nonetheless. And also because this whole country is feeling what we are, owners are desperate to get tenants in to pay their mrtg's and by now, having a foreclosure on your record has become old news.

So, we hope to find as ideal of a place as possible here very shortly and get out of this house. Get settled into something much larger than this 1100 sq ft, 3 bdrm 1 bath home with no garage- 6 people, 2 giant breed dogs, and 4 cats share, well before said babies arrive.
Yes, I have kept my sanity if you're wondering. =) And a clean and tidy house too. I've been told other people could never be me lol, and they are probably right. It is not easy, but I'm good at making the best of the cards dealt to me at the time.
Nothing stays the same, there is not much further in the down direction things could go for us, they WILL change and everything always improves from where it is, eventually. That keeps me going. I will say I canNOT wait! to move! I sit daydreaming about houses. I don't know what it's like to have room that we NEED, I'm so used to roughing it around here.
I'm so used to kicking someone out of the bathroom because 2 people are waiting to use it.
I'm so used to 2 people being in the kitchen and constantly running into each other so no more than 2 are allowed.
I'm so used to not being able to have an adult conversation with Chris when kids are awake because 4 kids in a small space such as this, have no place else to go but in our faces carrying on while we yell to hear each other.
We won't mention how finding a place to put food is a chore,
and the fact that because we have no storage one tiny room has to serve 3 purposes,
a garage, laundry room and pantry in one.

Sound fun yet? Well we've done a lot of cursing of this place, not to mention it's almost 30 yrs old and falling apart. But, I will still miss it and all the memories we made here.
Bringing home the 2 babies we did here,
the Christmas's we've had here,
many memories and they are good ones.
This home does not harbor the stress it has brought us surprisingly, the love has overshadowed it.
I still enjoy the bright morning sun shining on me as I write this, just as much as I did the first morning I spent here.
And, I will miss the great neighborhood! But, we hope to stay near by because I really don't want to pull my kids out of school at the beginning of the year and switch. I guess whatever we have to do, will be what is done. We are exploring all of our options. If moving to a different city allows us a 4 or 5 bedroom house in our budget, where we will obviously be able to stay longer than a years time, than that would most likely be the smart choice verses taking a larger 3 bdrm here and having to move again so soon.

See? There is a lot going on.. again? or still. But I will take today as it comes,
just one more day
where anything can happen.